A Journey to Mars

Its raining. Actually its pouring. And I love it. It rained yesterday too. I sat on my porch overlooking the city, read a book, smoked my pipe, and thought about water... pretty amazing stuff... when you think about it.

A friend asked me this morning if Ill live in Seattle indefinitely. "I cant see Sarah and I ever living anywhere else" I told him. I feel at peace with that, but its up to God.

My heart hurts. I cant pinpoint the reason but I can think of some things that may be playing a part. First: my pride. It gets so intense and I become so ashamed and I want to hide under a heavy blanket. Humility hurts and I feel like Eustace getting his dragon skin ripped off by Aslan. Second: The physical reality of sin I encounter on a daily basis. Everyday I see people shaking as they walk down our street (which according to a local police officer we talked to is known as 'crack corner') looking for a fix, I walk literally ten feet from people as they lift the crack pipe to their lips and light up, or sniff white powder off a razor blade when they think no one is looking. Sunday morning I walked the streets picking up trash... condoms covered in vomit (they hide drugs in them and then swallow them, only to vomit them up later after transporting them), beer cans, cigarette butts, needles, soup cups, and gospel tracks ironically enough. The tension of wanting to scream "STOP, DONT GO ANY FURTHER, GRAB MY HAND!" at them as though they were on the edge of a cliff about to fall to their death and also not wanting anything to do with them at all... wishing they would just leave. I live in this constant tension of absolute grief and sorrow for their condition as well as a hateful judgment of them. Loving homeless who are truly out on their luck due to uncontrollable situations is one thing but loving junkies is hard. Third: I read this verse this morning: The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position. -James 1:9 Oh' my Lord! How am I supposed to do this?! This is so hard! I feel as though I cant stop rubbing my chest, trying to rub away the painful sanctification of living by faith through God's provision. Fourth: This whole election thing is driving me nuts and Ive been absolutely mourning for the 'political' state of our 'Christian culture.' Not the American culture mind you... as the American culture is not Christian, and our government is anything but... a post Christian nation we are indeed. The conversation in my heart has been a debate over justice and grace in social change... what will bring about a turn around? I believe that grace, not social policies or Christian bureaucrats, will bring change. The Church must be the Church, offering a grace so scandalous that people cannot resist it. What this looks like tangibly I will spend more time on later. Bottom line is Im a sinful guy living in a broken sinful system and just want heaven and Jesus to come!

MH downtown is going great. This weekend we open to the public and expect a large showing. Hoping for 500-700 people I think. People are really excited about what we are doing and how the spirit is moving, in fact we've been getting emails from people literally around the world who have been listening to the sermons online and tracking our blog. They say they are praying for us and one girl from the Eastern US told us she feels called to serve at our campus and is moving out here as soon as God provides a way. The lead singer of a band called Everclear called Tim last week to tell him he's excited about the church and wants to play a show at the campus. We've been in the local paper although this particular paper tends to lobby for whatever is on the ACLU's agenda. That means theyre not in favor of us...

Over all Im tired, but God's grace is sufficient and He makes my day, everyday. The light of His glory shows my way as I seek to see His name lifted high in downtown Seattle. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your prayers and support. Blessings, grace and peace to you all.

Ill end this update with the following encouragement from this guy you may have heard of named Paul:

Now I would remind you, brothers, of the gospel I preached to you, which you received, in which you stand, and by which you are being saved, if you hold fast to the word I preached to you— unless you believed in vain. For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve. Then he appeared to more than five hundred brothers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have fallen asleep. Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles. Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me. For I am the least of the apostles, unworthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me. Whether then it was I or they, so we preach and so you believed. - 1 Corinthians 15:1-11